“It’s happening… it’s REALLY happening!!!”
Funny how the above statement can be interpreted in different ways and placed equally well into different imaginative thought-plays. Has one planned out every move, taken risk, and is on the verge of well earned achievement? Is this someone who voluntarily signed up for an adventure, knowing full well the challenge lay within their own heart, mind, or body? Has someone just experienced a tragedy?
Regardless of where the mind went, one thing is certain… transition, change.
When one finds that they are in the midst of transition, planned or unplanned, how does one begin to navigate the changing landscape? Once-known points of reference are bound to disappear; whether it is a career, health, friends, family, thought-structures, emotions, physical location, or points of view; any and all are on the chopping block as you move into unknown territory. So, how does one find their way through this position all will inevitably find themselves in?
Fixed compass points. When the familiar landmarks are gone, one must find their personal compass points to plot their way.
Emotional Decision Making
My first compass point is to scrutinize my decision making process. As I find myself at a crossroad, or fork, or rapids to be crossed I look inside & examine my emotions surrounding the choices. I work to peal back the layers of thought and emotion that have formed that option in my mind.
Is the choice fear based?
Fear is a great motivator for decision making… unfortunately it most often does not keep us safe. It keeps us trapped.
There is no way around this. As a species we have embraced fear as a guide and safety measure. How often do we find ourselves in a moment or place or situation where we are frustrated, unhappy, unfulfilled and yearning for more out of this life, but decide not to move forward for fear of being uncomfortable?
Instead choose through love. Which choice aligns with your heart? Which choice makes you feel more open? Which choice presents fear of the unknown as the only fear? These are good places to start.
Recognize the fear, imagine yourself for a moment without it. Find the love within yourself, use this as your bearing, your “magnetic north”.
When transition and change are occurring in ones life there is an inherent connection to your thoughts, attitudes, emotions, values, friends, and goals. To keep on with the landscape metaphor, as one moves across a physical landscape, the perspective shifts. What was once a raging river to be crossed is now a glittering ribbon on the horizon, what was once grandeur and awe are now a spine of rugged peaks to be trekked through and climbed, searched for a pass before the threat of oncoming winter. Perspectives change.
While the perspective shift is easy to see as inevitable in the physical, it tends to be less apparent in the more subtle bodies; The emotions, the mind, the spirit.
Challenge your perspectives and what you have known as the guiding principal of your life. Are they truly yours, or inherited from others? Are the current perspectives held counter-productive to the transition? Prepare to challenge your prejudice, your world view, your definitions… especially of yourself.
Suspend judgement. Do the work. Be uncomfortable. One doesn’t get very far if one insists that their perspective of the tree in their front yard never change.
This anthem is stated so often, it has almost become a platitude as opposed to a guiding principal. I just want to take a few lines and describe what this phrase means to me.
For me, letting go is a process of unraveling my emotions from desired outcome. Why is a certain outcome so important to me? Is it security? Is it other’s definition of success? Is it maintaining a standard of respect from my community? Is it love for another? Is it me being afraid of failure… or success?
There is a multitude of thoughts, emotions, and attitudes in endless mixes and mutations that wrap around every goal, desire, love, hate, courage, and fear we experience. Only by untwisting ourselves from the situation we are experiencing can we begin to see a path out of the wilderness.
When faced with an emotional clinging, examine it. Why is it so important? What space is it taking up in your heart? What purpose is it serving? Does it strengthen or weaken? How is it used as a definition in life? Have courage to look at the emotional mooring ties and be willing to cut the ropes that have you lashed to the shore. The same goes for perceived responsibility.
The tethers that hold us in place are most often a result of fear, freedom in navigation through transition requires untying those ropes. If untying the ropes is a release of fear and attachment, what is to fill the void?
Choose peace & faith.
Practice peace & faith.